Can I be real?
Sometimes I’m overwhelmed, anxious and doubting if I’ll ever muster the ever-trending buzz-word, “gratitude” again. Sometimes, giving thanks feels like a pipe dream.
The truth is…
It’s okay to feel un-grateful.
You have needs.
When your needs aren’t met, stress and striving overwhelm your gratitude.
You have the need to feel safe, secure, loved, accepted, respected, seen and heard. When these basic needs are not met, you don’t have to feel grateful.
When a client asked me: How do I feel grateful when I don’t? I felt prompted to write an unconventional Thanksgiving post.
This was my response: You have needs for a reason; When your needs aren’t met you will most definitely feel angry, insecure, frustrated and anxious (anything besides gratitude). Instead of feeling ashamed, let these feelings point back to your needs.
Do you feel angry that you’re living paycheck to paycheck? Good to know! You have a deep need for security.
Do you feel sad because you’ve been single for awhile? Good to know! You have a deep need for love.
Do you feel anxious about an overload of work? Good to know! You have a deep need for peace.
This week’s mindfulness challenge is to stop forcing gratitude. Instead, own your needs and speak up on their behalf.
When you voice your needs with gratitude, instead of the shame and fear culture heaps on them, you will start to act differently. Your actions will inspire change. The changes will inspire (authentic) gratitude.
Here is a question you don’t hear often: What are you NOT grateful for this Thanksgiving?
Tell me in the comments below what you’re NOT grateful for this Thanksgiving. Once you vent, tell me which NEED is at the root of this un-thankfulness.
Go on now, have an unconventional Turkey Day you powerhouse you!
Side Note News Flash: Are you feeling wary of getting your hopes up that things will work out the way you want? Do you neeeeed to be the 1st to know about my next book which addresses our deepest need: trust? Awesome! Get on the list here.
May we heal fully, live freely and love boldly,
Best-Selling Author and Certified EFT Practitioner
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