How to Do Inner Child Work
I used to be ashamed of the Reiki Table in my mom’s basement.
Now I look back on that childhood memory with pride.
Inner growth is cool.
Inner growth is not just for the chronically ill, broken, or blocked. It is for the high achiever with big dreams that will stop at nothing else but reaching them.
To finally write the book, secure the dream job, or reach a new level of happiness, all require you to break through comfort zones, fear, and limiting beliefs that started years ago.
You adopted outdated fears on the school playground like, “People will reject me.”
You inherited limiting mindsets from observing your young parents like, “You have to struggle to succeed.:
You picked up unwanted habits in college like binge-watching Netflix instead of working on your project.
Inner growth is brave: You must bravely look at the memories that instilled these patterns. Then you must do the work to not only see the memories with new eyes but to embody a new version of yourself (which often feels risky).
If you’ve read my previous posts you know that Inner Child Work, paired with EFT/Tapping, is my favorite way to grow.
Inner child work = When you teleport back in time and reparent your inner child.
Imagine the times you were hurt, bullied, embarrassed, afraid.
What did you need at the time?
Advice. Comfort. Hugs. Love. Being seen. Being believed. Better boundaries. Permission to be a kid.
Reparenting is all of the above.
In my Inner Child Workshop I teach people to reparent using a top-down and bottom-up approach:
Top down inner child work = When you look at your current limitations to growth and trace them back to when you picked up those limitations in childhood.
Triggers = The situations and people who make you emotional (insecure, anxious, resentful, etc).
According to psychologist Harville Hendrix, 80% of triggers stem from past experiences.
For example, the only reason you’re afraid to launch your business in 2024 is because in 2004 you saw your parent’s business fail. Or another examaple I hear is that you feel anxious around domineering personalities because in 1994 your dad couldn’t control his temper.
Top-down inner child workshop is the practice of following your current feelings back to the first time you felt them.
Then, you help the inner child process the feelings they couldn’t process at the time. When you let go of the stuck emotions and outdated fears, you suddenly see your current situation with clear and confident adult eyes.
Feeling insecure about a new project? Go find the insecure 12-year-old and help them see the bigger picture. 80% likelihood you’ll feel more confident and clear now.
Try this simple inner child work exercise on your main goal:
Where do you currently feel stuck in reaching this goal? (ex Goal: write a new book. Stuck: don’t feel like what I have to say is good enough)
Choose a situation that symbolizes this stuck point. (ex: Not publishing this blog because I feel it’s not ready)
How does this situation make you feel? (ex: Anxious and tight in solar plexus)
Imagine your current situation is a mirror to the past and ask yourself: How old is this feeling? How old were you when you first felt it? (ex: Feels like 11 years old when I would spin and spiral before a public speaking assignment).
What feelings and fears were you experiencing at that time? (ex: Fear of being judged and messing up)
What did you need at the time? (ex: I needed tools like EFT tapping and mindfulness to ease my nerves. I then needed a reminder that people don’t expect me to be perfect.)
How can you give yourself what you need today? (ex: I can tap to quiet my inner critic and remind myself that I don’t need to be perfect).
Take one action step to integrate these insights today. (ex: I will edit this article and focus on making it USEFUL instead of perfect.)
Don’t just read these questions, answer them.
Tapping Tip: Tap as you re-read your answers. Tap and read until you feel neutral. Then, tap and read until you feel motivated to take action.
Go deeper: Learn to reparent your younger self so that their patterns don’t affect your progress.
The side effects I’ve seen personally from inner child work include:
Ease-filled income
More spaciousness
Better boundaries
Healthier relationship with hubby
Dream career
Less anger
Clearer skin
NO MORE MIGRAINES
More patience with family
Ability to raise rates without guilt
More creativity (I made 9 online courses this year!)
Less procrastination
On January 9th, I’ll be teaching a new group of students how to reparent their inner child so they can reach goals with ease.
I’m personally working on beliefs that could block me from truly enjoying my postpartum and stepping into a new phase of EASE in my career.
What about you?
What goals do you want to reach? What beliefs, habits, or feelings stand in your way?
To connect the dots between your current goals and past conditioning that might stop you, use the 8 questions.
If you want NOTHING to stop you, join me on January 9,16,23, and 30th from 10 - 12:30 pm Pacific Standard Time.
If you can’t come live, calls are recorded and uploaded to a swanky online portal you can revisit for life.
As soon as you enroll, you get access to dozens of EFT/tapping meditations and masterclasses.
Explore Inner Child Workshop.
This is my LAST LIVE workshop until late 2025. Why?
My baby girl is due mid-February so this is the final push before the real pushing begins ;)